This week, the Collective answer a question from a Lightworker who wrote in to ask:
Question: Why it is so difficult to stop “self-sabotage”? Most people I know really struggle with that. I realize that self-love is the cure, but that seems to be tough to do for so many.
The Collective: Greetings, friends! We are glad to have this opportunity to speak with you once again.
This is an excellent question, and one that merits real thought.
For you are here to learn to love yourselves, whatever your life experiences have been in the past, and are in the present.
And this can be a challenging road, to love who you are and to learn to release the unconscious desire to “protect” yourself from possible dangers and future trouble, by stopping yourself from moving forward in your journey.
Some of you possess great ability in the arts, such as music or drawing or dance or theatre.
Some of you possess great ability in math or science or technology.
Some of you are brilliant at nurturing, at facilitating healing, or at comforting and encouraging.
Others at envisioning, designing, building, or producing.
All of these are areas of genius.
And though some areas are valued by your societies more than others, all are badly needed in your world.
We would say, that one of the biggest ways you could ever hold yourself back, is to wait for some perceived moment of perfecting of your abilities before you go out to offer them to the world.
The vast majority of Lightworkers are what is termed “sensitive souls,” people who feel things deeply and take life seriously, even though they love to laugh and enjoy life at times.
“Angel in the Sky in Stamford, Connecticut” – Photo by Lynne Newman
Most of you feel that you lack the skills or innate abilities—the “talents”—to offer the ideas or abilities you most love to others (“talent” being an odd word, as true talent is doing the thing you were born to do, not because you are better at it than most, but because it is the thing that makes you most joyful).
Then one day you notice that whole decades have gone by, and you still have not lived out your dream.
You have never believed yourself “good enough” to publish your book, even though numerous self-publishing channels are open to you now.
Or you have never competed in a sport or dance or music competition, or performed before others, because you were pushing that moment ever forward in time, thinking that someday, you would be good enough.
This is the self-sabotage you refer to.
It is not simply a matter of not doing what you love, or of not allowing wonderful things—Love, Abundance, Peace and Freedom—to come to you.
Self-sabotage is allowing them to come, but in small amounts or low levels that approximate your dreams, while not letting you express them fully.
And so we would say, ask yourself today (not tomorrow, but right now), “If I were already famous or successful (however you define that) at this, what would I do next? If I had already proved myself at this, and heard everyone say, ‘You are wonderful at that!’—what would I be doing right now?”
And then do that thing, or some version of it.
Begin to break the unwritten, unconscious rule you were taught as a child, that only the wealthy and famous get to do what they want in this life.
Or that only those who are young and beautiful deserve or get to experience Love. Or that only those in certain professions can earn well, and so on.
Release all those lies long enough to imagine yourself already at home in the vibration of doing or having or being what you love–already having whatever you dream of in those moments that you allow yourself to feel at home in your true joy.
Fully feel to be in that reality for a moment.
See and hear and feel what it is to experience that, whether it is independent wealth, a healthy and joyful family life or a joyful romance, fulfilling work, a successful business, a new artistic creation, months of sailing round the world—whatever it is, take a moment to imagine yourself as if you were living it at this moment.
Look down—how are you dressed? Do you weigh a bit more or less than you do now? Are you healthier, and feeling more vital?
Who is with you, if anyone? What is the weather like on that cruise ship, or on the hill above the sea, looking out from the window of your new cottage, where you’re painting or playing music or writing plays?
This is your fifth dimensional life that you’re letting yourself see.
This is your New Earth life, where there are no longer any excuses not to live out your dreams, and no impediments such as “I won’t have the money,” or “My family and friends wouldn’t approve.”
Self-sabotage is a defense of the ego-mind.
Whereas, in the New Earth reality, it is the heart-mind that will inform you, with wisdom and clarity, what the next step in the journey is to fulfilling your dreams.
You are all of you learning to love yourself enough to allow that beautiful moment when you realize that you are now living the life you once only dreamt of living.
You are coming into a time when “can’ts” and “shouldn’ts” will not come into your thinking.
You are releasing the old tendencies to protect yourself from possible “failure” (though there is no such thing, only steps along the path).
You are allowing Joy and Creativity and Fulfillment, because that is what the energies now reaching the Earth are supporting, enlivening, and empowering you to experience.
Yes, it is most assuredly exhausting some days to take on all of these changes.
We know that many are feeling very tired, almost ill some days, as if you had just been set down upon some strange planet where the atmosphere is very different, and you are adjusting to new air to breathe and new ground to walk upon.
Your bodies, minds, and spirits are most assuredly making huge adjustments.
But understand that increased self-love—allowing and accepting the level of self-love needed to accept Abundance and fulfillment of your dreams—is part of the heart-opening miracle of the New Earth, the New Human.
And so we welcome you to this new level of life and living, and we say, You were born to grasp this beautiful new Truth in both hands, and claim it as your own.
Namaste, dear ones! We are with you, always.
Copyright 2016, Caroline Oceana Ryan